Final Fronteir matches/segments

Devine v Angelo match


Chris Divine!

*The fans can’t believe it as Chris Divine walks out onto the stage. The current EWNCW & ICW, as well as former HWA superstar is looking great as he makes his way down the ramp. The fans are cheering loudly as he slides into the ring.*

Rich: Who the hell is this guy?

Herb: Do you not pay attention to anything outside your own world? This is Chris Divine!

Rich: I don’t like him.

Herb: You don’t like anybody.

Rich: So what’s he doing here?

Herb: He’s in a special match!

Rich: Every EWA match is a special match.

Herb: Well, I don’t disagree there.

Divine: Well, it's come that time. The send off show, the ending, the grand stand from EWA. So Divine was contacted, after a little ole place called HWA was shut down, and asked if he wanted to come to EWA for a one time appearance. Of course, Divine is up for anything. So, with that being said, Divine knows there is one man here tonight, that Divine wants to finish things with. One man that Divine wants to close the chapter with. You know who you are, so why don't you get your italian ass out here now!

Antonyo Angelo!

*The Italian Stallion, Antonyo Angelo, walks out from the back.A huge amount of boos from the fans, as he makes his way down the ramp and into the ring.Antonyo picks up a mic.Antonyo goes to speak but the fans are chanting Divine's name.*

Rich: Oh this guy can really go!

Herb: He can go home.

Rich: Well that’s just disrespectful.

Herb: I don’t agree, Angelo disrespects everybody.

Rich: Well I for one can’t wait to see Angelo kick Divine’s ass.

Herb: Well you may be waiting a while, Divine has got this.

Angelo: Shut up, shut up...If you haven't noticed i have a few things to say to this man so can you please shut up!

The crowd continues to boo Angelo but Divine says to them to stop

Angelo: Chris Divine the last HWA Universal Champion....

*The fans go crazy after that statement*

Angelo: The only reason that you are the last Universal Champion is because i never got my rematch for that title.. You see Divine, Antonyo Angelo was not happy to see HWA shutting down.HWA was my life, my home.It was there that i won my first title.It was there that me and you had epic matches.And now i'm here in the last EWA show ever.Another big company is shutting down...No let me rephrase that.Another shitty company is shutting down.

*Huge Boos from the crowd*

Angelo: But if you think for one second that i care about HWA or EWA, then you have to be stupider than these idiots here tonight.

More bigger boos from the fans

Angelo: I don't care about HWA or EWA, i don't care if this is their last show, i don't care for the EWA or HWA fans.I'm here for two reasons.First to put this company out of their misery. And secondly i'm here to get my revenge.

Death Row the final HWA PPV.It was me and you in a Hell in a Cell match.A five star match maybe it was one of the best matches in wrestling's history.Yes it was until the time that Alex Kidd showed up...

*The fans pop that loud*

Angelo: I don't blame you for what you did Divine.I would have done the same thing.But we've never got the clean match we wanted.And tonight is my chance to prove to you and everyone who's watching this show tonight that i am better than you.

Look Divine i have nothing more than respect to you.I don't like your attitude or your stupid jokes but i respect you as a wrestler.And tonight i hope you brought you A game with you because you are gonna need it.And trust me when i say this, i will be the one who is gonna be standing tall after this match.Because Divine what i say i do and what i want i get.My name is Antonyo Angelo and i am the Italian Stallion."

Chris Divine vs. Antonyo Angelo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=611-M5Lz-8s
(stop at 8:51)

Herb: A huge twisting powerslam! Divine could have him here!

Rich: Come on Angelo! What are you playing at?

*Divine immediately goes for a cover!

One!

Two!

Angelo powers out and immediately looks to lock in an armbar but Divine reverses out, hitting an armdrag, bouncing off the ropes and dropkicking Angelo in the back. He grabs Angelo in a sleeper hold but Angelo immediately reverses and hits a quick fireman’s carry. He goes for a cover.

One!

Divine powers out and twists Angelo over to the canvas. Both men reach their feet at the same time and Angelo hits a big clothesline. He bounces off the rope and hits an elbow to Divine’s heart. He grabs Divine’s head and drags him up, hitting a vertical suplex quickly. He scrambles across and goes for another cover.

One!

Two!

Divine powers out this time as Angelo continues to keep the pressure on, hitting a quick knee to the shoulder of Divine. He backs up as Divine begins to get up, holding his shoulder, and runs at him, hitting a big boot that drops Divine down again. He picks Divine up and whips him into the corner. He follows him to the corner and hits a big elbow to Divine’s face. He places Divine onto the top rope and begins to look for the Emperor’s Cutter (Top Rope RKO) but Divine senses the danger.

Divine begins to fight out and kicks Angelo in the gut as he climbs up, sending him back down to the canvas. Angelo gets up and goes to grab Divine again, but Divine flips over Angelo and hits a sunset powerbomb! Divine drops down and covers Angelo.

One!

Two!

Thr-NO!

Angelo powers out as Divine can’t believe it. He backs up to the ropes and begins to signal for the end, for an intervention. Angelo finally begins to move as Divine stalks him. He goes for Divine Intervention (RKO) but Angelo throws him off and as Divine stays on the floor, hits an elbow drop to Divine’s chest.

He drags Divine back to his feet, and goes for the Caesar’s Slam (Angle Slam) but Divine drops down mid-move and as Angelo turns around, lays him out with Divine Intervention! He covers Angelo.

One!

Two!

Thre-NO!

Angelo somehow kicks out! Divine is in complete disbelief as he sits next to Angelo, who is barely moving. Divine stands up and grabs Angelo by the head, he drags Angelo to his feet, but Angelo hits a punch to the gut of Divine. Divine comes back with a knee to the gut and hits a DDT. He picks Angelo up and situates him perfectly, before landing Divine Inspiration (Styles Clash), before covering Angelo.

One!

Two!

Three! *

Herb: Divine does it! Divine picks up the victory!

Rich: Oh you’ve gotta be kidding me.

*Alex Kidd receives a microphone after his entrance, the final entrance in his EWA career, his final entrance as an EWA world champion*

Kidd: So I've heard that idiot CJ, gave away our company to an Australian koala in a poker game. To be honest it doesn't surprise me one bit, I knew from day one that imbecile was to be in charge of my company, I knew, I just knew he would kill it off somehow. Ruin the careers of many, and also make people feel stupid enough to waste their time with this shame of a wrestling company. If I knew that something like this would happen so soon, I would've stopped him. The fact that I couldn't stop him angers me. I built this company from day one! It was nobody else! I gave this company everything I had to give! Every single show every single pay per view I could, I tried my damn best to steal the show! Nobody else helped me, I carried this company! My name is Alex Kidd! I am the IT Factor of professional wrestling today! I made history here and in the world of wrestling today. I'm the longest reigning world champion in EWA history, I am the only credible world champ this company has ever had! Now it's all gone because of some idiot.

Kidd: Here's a little history lesson for all of you. Alex Kidd and Rob Rage started a while back in HWA, which is now also dead. They started out as nobodies, as jobbers in an HWA pay per view. They debuted against each other with nothing to gain but respect. I earned that respect. We had our disputes around the way, and when EWA was created I got a World Title opportunity, the odds were against me 3 big superstars against tiny little Alex Kidd. The odds were against me, and making Rob Rage an enemy wasn't going to help. The fact that I overcame the odds and the fact that I stand here today as your first, current, last and only EWA World Champion means I am the best. And I don't give a damn what you say! I respect Rob Rage for his hope, but he has to remember I am the World Champion, yesterday was not my day of reckoning and today won't be it either

Kidd: I've been pissing people off for a long time, but I have never changed my ways. I have always been like this. I'm selfish, and this is my generation. Every night I prove the doubters shortcuts or not at the end of the day when you see the Main Event you see Alex Kidd, I am the greatest, Roba you keep lining them up and I keep knocking them down, it still won't change tonight. I have had success since winning this title, even beating the crap out of the HWA World Champion at the time, and being in the Clique, the most dominant stable ever. I will continue to dominate, I will remain World Champion forever, just like I said and here we are again. I will stay with this title until this company dies, which is tonight.

Kidd: Let the feeling sink in, I will continue to do whatever it takes to keep the World Title around my waist, it doesn't matter who you are, or where you are. It didn't happen before Rob, it won't happen now. My rise to greatness can't be ignored, I never wanted this championship so bad, and I've been training hours for this match. I've sacrificed everything for EWA, HWA and every other company I worked for, sometimes people don't understand everything you go through to entertain the fans. I deserve to win again and I will win again, Rob like I said before give it up. If you can't beat me the first 50 matches you won't beat me the 51st. You're one of the best but you're just not ready. Now if you excuse me.............I've got a World Title to retain, may the best man win........Me.

*Alex Kidd drops the microphone and goes to his corner*

*As CJ gets up he sees the fans cheering for him even though he just got slaughtered by Van Hooligan X, Eugene comes out, with a CJ, DJ, Heskey, RAMJAM, Sweet Jones, Cody Mcderell, JJJ and SMOG Monster ripped me off shirt, he comes out with a microphone waving at everyone he can get a hold of and smiling biting his thumb*

Eugene: It is with my great pleasure I announce, one match that was left off the card, but due to some hobo telling me to chase my dreams, I became the gm of this ppv and and and, *Eugene bites his thumb* One more match has been added *Eugene starts clapping and jumping* The ClusterFuck Chaos Match! YAY!

*The fans don't know what the hell he's talking about but they cheer anyways cus it's Eugene*

Eugene: Now the rules are
You have to get a ladder into a massive cell with another ladder on top of it, past the lumberjacks over a steel cage . Put your opponent into at least one table in the middle of the cage. Climb the ladder through a whole in the top of the cell. climb up the second ladder on top of the cell. get the title. Go back down through the cell, over the top of the steel cage, through the lumberjacks and escape the hell in the cell match before running up the ramp over a line to be declared the winner...
So it's not that confusing now is it? So let's get it started, with our first entry.......CJ! YAY everybody let's cheer for CJ

*CJ gets up and starts crying*

Eugene: Don't cry CJ, I'll get a friend here for you, but first I have to announce the new announcers I hired especially for this match

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gV_m6iaB70

*Booker T comes out to the surprise of the fans, he gives Eugene a hugas the camera gets a closeup of what Booker T is telling Eugene

Booker: Lemme tell ya something sucka

*Booker then leaves Eugene and heads to the commentary desk*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEcFNi_Zs9w

Booka: Oh mah goodness shucky ducky quack quack! It's it's that sucka from TNA! It's Zack Flo Rida!

*Robbie E comes out wearing a pink sweater, as he tells Eugene he's not on the list, he then fist pumps to the ring*

Booka: Oh mah goodness, nice to meet ya Zack Wacky

Robbay: Are you serious dude? You really fucking serious? I ain't no brski I'm a guido, and yo nigga ass aint on the list

Booka: Tell me ya didn't just say that

I'll be editing this match every day, will take me a few days





Booka: Wut Da Hayull, who da hayull is dis guy?

Robbie: This is DJ, ya know CJ's brother? He's the guy that got kidnapped by some people then magically came back

Booka: You seem to know a lot about this company but we already got 2 participants in this match, who else it gonna be?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEJiogGujdc

Robbie: Oh my god ot's it's it's..THE GAME! TRIPLE H

Booker: No no no, man wut da hayull ya talkin bout sucka this is JJJ, the king of jobbers. You misinformed, I thought you were cool and all

*Triple J makes his entrance walking down slowly pointing at everything looking pissed off with a water bottle, as we go inside JJJ's mind*¨

JJJ in his mind: Oh god oh god oh god

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0WsMZGaglo

Booka: It's the Smog Monster, things about to get interesting with this addition, this match gonna end careers man Imma tell ya right now

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWP-z4O8Ddo

Booka: This man in my fave 5, just cus he said Imma a rather fast balck man

Robbie: This guy is just racist. What you talking about?

Booka: No black man can be racist trust me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gV_m6iaB70

Robbie: What the hell? You're in the match Booker?

Booka: Ain't nobody tell me I was in it but whatever Imma be right back in a few minutes

Robbie: e were only hired for this match though come back!

*As Booka T gets up, Jacob Cass comes out doing the Booker T pose with the flame pyro*

Booka: Man wut da hayull is this sucka thinkin takin myspot? This guy bein crazy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXIRAseagYs

*Sweet Jones comes out as happy as ever before*

Robbie: Wait this guy still thinks he works here? I thought he dissapeared from EWA action months ago

Booka: No he just couldn't get past security

Robbie: Why aren't they stopping him now?

Booka: Security guards are on lunch break

Robbie: In the middle of a show?

Booka: Yeah, Eugene gave them this match off

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5v1NhaKjVlE

Robbie: Ohmy godit's it's it's CODY MCDERRELL THE ONE MAN COUNTRY MAN

Booka: Man I wonda how many otha peeple gonna be in it, I'd like to see at least 5 more

*Euguene signals one more, the lights turn off*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPs1ptajM_E

*30 seconds pass with no undertaker, sting or anybody else dark or mysterious when suddenly*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1D5Sa2Yq-2g

Booka: It's the debut of RAMJAM! HE GONNA JAM US ALL MY GAWD, Hide Robbay

Robbie: What you talking about? Bro get up, you're making a fool of yourself

*We get a closeup of Heskey in a state of shock, as RAMJAM just laughs at him*

Eugene: And the Lumberjacks will be me and these guys...........

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eiAIFueQixo

*As the music hits the following people come out
George W Bush
Ashton Kutcher
Tom Brady
Tim Tebow
Joey Barton
The black guy from Scrubs (Just like that)
Gabriel Iglesias
Spongebob
Power Ranger Red
Daquian Andrews and Tyrone Johnsson
Emile Heskey
Mr Bean
ANGRY BLACK MAN
Gillberg
Brian "The Number 1 Contender" SMells
Carly Ray Jepsen
DeSean Williams
Ray Guess

Tyrone and Daquian see Desean so Desean gets kicked out*

*The LumberJacks climb the cell and we are ready to go*

*The bell rings, everybody stares at each other, CJ is still dead on the floor in the middle of the mat, suddenly yellow liquid starts to drop down on the mat as the competitors look up, Emile Heskey just pissed himself*

*Suddenly Cody Mcderell is stupid enough to go after RAMJAM and gets knocked down, Heskey does too but fails, Sweet Jones goes to RAMJAM and now suddenly evrybody just starts bitch slapping RAMJAM as he looks to be in trouble, Ivanho Heskey gets up and gets handed a dildo by Emile, Heskey uses the weapon on JJJ, then on Jones, then on DJ. Heskey starts beating the crap out of everybody, as nobody can take him down, he looks at the clusterfuck chaos championship.
The crowd cheer him on, as e climbs the ladder to the top of the cell, but forgets set up the ladder so he falls down the invisible ladder*

*As RAMJAM laughs he sets up a table and goes top rope.*

Booker: Wut da hayull! RAMJAM just put himself through a table!

*DJ gets up and starts bashing his head on the steel cage, but gets turned around by Smog Monster who throws Smog at him, They start brawling punch for punch as JJJ takes on Cody Mcderell, JJJ starts chopping him in the chest*

*Heskey starts punching CJ who is still unconscious, DJ helps CJ by headbutting Heskey in his ankle, but for some reason it doesn't work and Heskey shoves a dildo up DJ's ass. CJ gets up from the smell of Booka T eating a hotdog and starts crying, everybody turns to CJ crying and stop fighting , they then go over to CJ and calm him down, while we get a closeup of Tim Tebow praying*

*CJ, blinded by his tears, accidentally slaps DJ in the face, as everybody now goes to climb the ladder, all at once. Unfortunately everybody is too stupid to realize that when they get up there they will be slaughtered by the lumberjacks*

*Suddenly Security come out*

Booka: Imma tell ya right now Robbay dey goin afta sweet jones

Robbie: No shit

*Security take out sweet jones and throw him out of the arena while everybody else just continues climbing, Suddenly something happens shocking the world*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5-ZFFOWoaU

Robbie: IT'S BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY

Booker: Who the hayull?

*Suddenly everybody stops, and they start dancing, while we turn to Robbie and Booker who Robbie is fist pumping and Booker T doing a spinaroonie*

Bill: Now guys, I know you got this match going on but......

Crowd: BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL

Bill: I'm a lumberjack now!

*Bill Nyes runs down to the cage and starts taking out any lumberjack that steps a foot close to him, as the wrestlers begin to invade the top of the cell, evrybody is going at it, evrybody punching and kicking. Heskey falls down breaking the top of the cell bringing down everybody else*

Robbie: We got 20 plus people inside the ring and there's nobody in there's no medical attention!

Booka: Inertia is a property of matter though Robbay

Robbie: So how does that help?

Booka: I don't know but Bill Nyes he a smart man yall. I think the sucka can dig it

*The only man left standing is RAMJAM who the only thing he needs to do now is climb two ladders and grab the title while escaping lumberjacks and getting to the top of the entrance ramp, my god this took me a while to find out. RAMJAM starts to climb, Cody gets up and starts chasing him, with no luck as he falls down by himself.*

*RAMJAM is so close to getting to the second ladder, he reeaches for the oter ladder when Smog Monster throws a smoke grenade causing RAMJAM to miss the ladder and fall on top of Tim Tebow who was still praying*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5v1NhaKjVlE

Robbie: Oh no it's Cody Mcderell's father it's Heath Slater!

Booka: This guy looks familiar.

Slater: I'm not taking this man, I've been proving myself in WWE for 2 years now with no respect whatsoever, so EWA decides to do a clusterfuck chaos match and not invite me? I mean come on. So I will now include myself in this match as an official competitor!

*Slater goes over to attack CJ who starts to get up again, he punches DJ as well and climbs both ladders, but right before he can grab the title he sees Brian Smells hanging on to the championship

Smells: This is my opportunity man! I've been number one contender for years now and you ain't ruining my moment now!

*Smells and Slater start to go punch for punch, then Slater gets the upper hand and bitch slaps Brian Smells, who then lands on a table which gets broken on impact, at this point nobody can stop Slater, it's his shot now but! He forgets he has to put another opponent through a table so he still hasn't won. Until JJJ gets up and starts elbowing Slater, Slater is wobbly but reacts, yet not in time to get a hold of the ladder as CJ jumps from the ceiling knocking down both Slater and JJJ.*

*Now CJ has the victory in hands as he is the man on top of the ladder, he's gotten 2 men through a table and climbed both ladders, all he has to do is grab the title and run to the ramp. Joey Barton grabs CJ by the arse and starts smacking it as CJ starts moaning for some odd reason? Heskey starts climbing again as The Black Guy From Scrubs tries to stop him, it isn't working though as Heskey pele kicks him and climbs once more, trying to grab the second ladder, but he slips and falls as now we get RAMJAM on the top rope and..OH MY GOD HE JUST 10180 splashed Heskey my god them turns and flips*

*CJ has yet to get rid of Joey Barton up his ass so he grabs a marshmallow from his pocket and starts hitting him but Joey Barton has a feather and obviously he knocks down CJ with his feather, but CJ doesn't give up, cus he's super CJ. RAMJAM climbs up and starts playing clown music to distract both Barton and CJ, who decide to hug it out and kick RAMJAM in the balls.*

*JJJ and Cody Mcderell play Twister with Smog Monster as everybody except RAMJAM is fighting on top of the ladder. CJ finally takes Barton out with a knockout punch and reaches for the title....E HAS IT CJ HAS THE CC TITLE BUT NOW HE HAS TO CLIMB DOWN AND ESCAPE. Heskey has gotten up by now and they both stare at each other, both long time friends, both men raped kids together and played with themselves facing off for the very first time. Heskey kicks him in the knee, CJ kicks CJ, Heskey pokes CJ in the arm, CJ hits himself in the face and drops the title but Heskey has yet to put one man on the table so he grabs the title and puts it through a table thinking it's a person, but Heskey just puts himself through a table *

Booker: Wait where the hell is....

Robbie: Don't say it,maybe he won't come out

*Everybody is down nobody is standing tall, then out of nowhere we see somebody under the ring getting out and it's...JACOB CASS. Jacob had been hiding under the ring this whole time as he gets in the ring, but at first attempt................



OH MY GOD JAM IS FALLING FROM THE CEILING TO THE RING*

*Booker stands up in amazement as he sees the ring full of jam and all other kinds of sticky stuff*

Booker: Oh mah goodness what the hayull happened over here dawg, I think the ring is flooded with jam from the ramjam monster

Robbie: Ya think? Wait what the?

*CJ, Heskey and RAMJAM are not affected, RAMJAM is used to it, and CJ and Heskey are used to sticky stuff all over there bodies without going into tasty delicious milky detail*

*RAMJAM and Heskey fight off with each other as CJ punches himself in the face, both RAMJAM and Heskey run to the top of the ladder, climb the second with both of them on top, then they realize the title isn't there anyways. It must be somewhere on the ground. RAMJAM doesn't care though he s out to destroy as he smashes a beer bottle in Heskey's head, leaving Heskey busted open ready to fall and break not one or two but 3 tables and a hamburger, which causes him to go through the ring mat making a huge hole in the ring*

*RAMJAM looks down with a smile on his clown face as CJ gets up and looks at Heskey lying there while RAMJAM laughs, CJ turns into Super CJ and climbs both ladders quicker than before, he pulls down RAMJAM to themat and hits a 10 star frog splash!!!!!!!!!!!!!*

*CJ doesn't know what to do, he had a brutal match earlier with Van , now he can win it everybody is down! He goes to Heskey's aid as Heskey looks dead. CJ asks Heskey if he's ok*

Heskey: There......is.....*cough* a.....burger....up my ass

CJ: Where is the Clusterfuck Chaos title?

Heskey: It....is....inside.... my pants

*CJ reaches for the title inside Heskey's pants and when he thinks he has it he pulls Heskey's dick*

Heskey: In....my....pocket

*CJ looks through Heskey's pockets, as he finds the title CJ keeps looking for a way out, he's done the steps and all he has to do is find a way out and run to the entrance ramp*

Heskey: The refs....forgot...to close...the door *Heskey points to the cage door wide open*

*CJ runs with the championship to the entrance ramp and steps on the line to win the legendary dream match...The ClusterFuck Chaos match
CJ lifts the title with tears in his eyes as he shouts I DID IT MOMMA I DID IT as fireworks can be seen outside the arena*

Rich:Well its time for our second match of the night.

Herb: Yep, a PAIN! guy vs a Fury guy.

Brandon Medeiros

Rich: Wait? This loser is still around?

Herb: Yeah, seems EWA management wanted him to be part of the last show

Rich: Ok, I guess I will go to sleep now. I thought Killa got rid of this tool

Brandon Medeiros, with EWA PAIN! commentator Carter Davis, walk down the ramp, arm in arm. Brandon gets on the ring apron and holds the ropes open for Carter.

Rich: What is that freak Carter doing out here?

Herb: Er, not sure.

Carter Davis ask for and receives a mic.

Carter Davis: Seeing as this is the last show and management is only allowing the Fury team to do the announcing, I just had to come out here to make an announcement. I am pregnant with this mans baby. Yes, Brandon Medeiros and I have been having a torrid love affair. We are both so happy. We are getting married next week and everybody in invited *Carter and Brandon share a tender moment in the ring, embracing and kissing *

The EWA crowd doesn’t know what to make of this news- most just boo them both

Rich: Wait? Carter has both a penis and vagina?

Herb: Yeah, I accidentally saw him getting dressed. The guy is a freak- but both him and Brandon are happy, that’s all that matters

Rich: Well Brandon sucks

Herb: Yes he does

Ryku O’Ryan

Rich: Normally I’m for the heels, but I hope this guy kicks Brandon’s ass

Herb: Me too

Ryku O’Ryan comes out to massive cheers from the EWA faithful. He rushes down to the ring and slides in and gets right in Brandon’s face. Carter slaps Ryku in the face and hightails it out the ring.

Herb: Wow, they have a lot of love for this guy.

Rich: Yeah that and I think everybody wants to see Brandon get his ass kick

Brandon Medeiros vs Ryku O’Ryan

Brandon starts to apologize for Carter slapping Ryku but Ryku just halls off and punches him in the nose, busting him wide open. Brandon tries to run away but Ryku grabs him by the arm and takes him down to the mat and clamps on a Crippler Cross face and immediately starts to tap out. The ref ignores it and just lets Ryku inflict more pain on Brandon

Herb: Wait, what the hell is the ref doing?

Rich: His job- duh!

After about a minute, Ryku finally releases the hold then slides out the ring and grabs a chair and tosses it into the ring. The ref acts like he doesn’t see it. Ryku slides back into the ring and places the chair in one of the corners of the ring. He pulls Brandon up and whips him into that corner- Brandon hits the chair with a shitload of force- actually breaking the seat off from the rest of the chair. Brandon just falls to the mat yet again.

Herb: Why is the ref allowing this to happen?

Rich: I will say this once again- Brandon is a tool, he deserves this

Ryku picks up the seat and places it into the middle of the ring. He walks over to Brandon and pulls him up once again, bringing him into the middle of the ring. He sets up Brandon for a pedigree, hitting it right on the seat. Instead of covering Brandon, he hits him with another pedigree, followed by another, followed by another. Brandon is out cold now and is cover from head to toe in blood. Ryku finally places his foot on Brandon to pin him. The ref starts to count

One

Two

Three

Winner: Ryku O”Ryan

Herb: Well that was a one sided match. Ryku was just the better man

Rich: Ryku is the better man- he has been on fire on PAIN! Brandon is a tool, kept getting his ass kicked by Killa, now he has been destroyed by Ryku

Herb: You really don’t like Brandon do you?

Rich: Nope. I don’t care for his agent anymore either

Gaileo

Gaileo runs out to the ring through the crowd. He slides into the ring and gets into Ryku faces. They both stare at each other for about a minute, exchanging no words

Herb: Guess we are about to have yet another match. These guys hate each other

Instead of coming to blows, Gaileo extends his hand to Ryku and they both shake hands. Gaileo then raises Ryku’s arm in victory to huge cheers. After about a minute of celebrating in the ring and both men exchanging kind words- they see Brando trying to get up. Ryku and Gaileo both pick him up and toss him over the top rope into the Spanish announce table- causing it to splinter into pieces. Carter Davis rushes to him and starts crying out for help. Ryku and Gaileo finally leave the ring and head to the back to cheers.

KiLLA

Herb: What the hell is he doing out here? He has a match later on

KiLLA comes out to ringside flanked by 3 other men from his crew and PAINS! Official camera man- Chucky Nutz is following close behind. One is carrying what looks like a body bag. They walk over to where Brandon is sprawled out. They look at Carter and he just runs off like a little girl, screaming at the top of his lungs. Finally, Killa and his men place Brandon in the bodybag, zip it up and carry it off backstage. You can see that Brandon is now awake as the bodybag is twitching back and forth

Herb: Well thank God he is still alive

Rich: Meh

EWA camera man Chucky Nutz follows KiLLA and his crew out to back of the arena where they toss the bodybag into a dumpster.. Chucky zooms the camera in on the bodybag in the dumpster and screams can be heard from inside. The bodybag keeps trashing around and Chucky finally gets bored and heads back inside the arena where KiLLA and his guys had already returned to.

Herb: You think we should send help?

Rich: Nah! Lets move on

"DJ helps CJ by headbutting Heskey in his ankle, but for some reason it doesn't work and Heskey shoves a dildo up DJ's ass"

Can't stop laughing at this line...

"CJ then turns heel by slapping DJ in the face"

Is it possible to change this line to:

"CJ, blinded by his tears, accidentally slaps DJ in the face"

Not to be bitchy or anything but it seems awkward reading the words "CJ" and "Turns heel" in the same sentance

Shining Light escribió:"DJ helps CJ by headbutting Heskey in his ankle, but for some reason it doesn't work and Heskey shoves a dildo up DJ's ass"

Can't stop laughing at this line...

"CJ then turns heel by slapping DJ in the face"

Is it possible to change this line to:

"CJ, blinded by his tears, accidentally slaps DJ in the face"

Not to be bitchy or anything but it seems awkward reading the words "CJ" and "Turns heel" in the same sentance

Will do

i have to agree with Shining- that line was funny as shit

Herb: Wow, what a battle royal. Our EWA Hell Cats are not only tough as nails, but so damn hot. Don’t you agree Rich?

Rich: Oh yeah, I had a boner the whole match.

Herb: Yeah, I know, I’m sitting right next to you.

Rich: Elrieda Frewins women that were brought in were equally as hot. I loved how the helped Barbie win the match

Herb: I didn't. Anyways its time for some hardcore action.. In fact it’s a Hardcore Gauntlet match. EWA Hardcore Champion Gyakusatu will have his hands full as he has to defend against pretty much half the roster

Rich: Well that’s hardly fair.

Gyakusatu

Gyakusatu makes his way to the ring with a kendo stick in one hand and a whip in the other. His EWA Hardcore Belt is strapped around his waist. He places his weapons down on the mat and unfastens his belt and hands it to the ref. Although he had not been with EWA all that long, he receives a pretty decent pop from the crowd

Rich: Well he looks ready, I hope he can hold everybody off

Herb: The rules are simple. Everything is allowed in this match. You can be pinned, you can be counted out, but you can not be disqualified. The man still standing at the end will be the Hardcore Champion

Hardcore Gauntlet
Gyakusatu vs a lot of people if he can last that long

Paco Torres

Paco Torres rushes out to the ring with a heavy duty stapler in one hand and a burrito in the other. Before Paco enters the ring he eats the burrito.

Herb: And let the carnage begin

Gyakusatu picks up his kendo stick and dares Paco to rush at him. Paco takes the bait and runs towards Gyakusatu only to eat a kick to the face which takes Paco down- knocking the stapler from his hand. Gyakusatu immediately starts hitting Paco with the kendo stick to the chest, then the face. Paco rolls out the ring and runs up the ramp to the back. The ref starts counting him out.

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

Paco has been counted out.

Herb: Well that was quick

Jackie Walkon

Jackie Walkon comes out to the stage dragging a board- he gets zero reaction from the fans. The board is almost as long as him so its taking him awhile to get down the ramp and to the outside of the ring. Once there he finally shoves the board into the ring and enters the ring himself.

Rich: Who the hell is this loser? Love this entrance theme.

Herb: Some jobber who was lucky enough to last a few minutes in the ring with HolyJose at Untamed Khaos- he lost the match of course

Gyakusatu takes one step towards Jackie and wacks him in the head with the kendo stick knocking him out. Gyakusatu casually pins Jackie.

1

2

3

Jackie has been pinned. Gyakusatu shoves Jackie out the ring and awaits his next opponent.

Brandon Medeiros

Brandon staggers down the ramp still covered in blood from earlier.

Rich: How did this tool get out the bodybag, much less the dumpster?

Herb: Not sure, and really do not care

Brandon slowly slides into the ring where Gyakusatu immediately swings his kendo stick at him but Brandon ducks then hits Gyakusatu with a low blow followed up with a quick, but stiff clothesline which takes Gyakusatu down and goes for the pin.

1

2

Gyakusatu rolls Brandon over for the pin. They are both on top of the board now

1

Brandon kicks out

Rich: Dammit

Gyakusatu, still on top of Brandon, reaches over to the stapler that is still in the ring. He immediately puts one in Brandons forehead causing him to scream out in extreme pain. He goes for the pin once more

1

2

Brandon kicks out yet again

Rich: This tool just won’t give up

Gyakusatu bashes Brandon in the face with the stapler, then goes for the pin yet again

1

2

Kickout by Brandon

Herb: He just needs to give up

EHC: No, I want him to be punished more

Rich: Who the hell was that?

Herb: A member of EWA creative. He tells us what to say- as do the other members of creative

Gyakusatu can’t believe Brandon keeps kicking out so he does the unthinkable. Gyakusatu bashes Brandon in the face once more with the stapler, knocking him out. He then proceeds to staple Brandon’s right arm to the board, then his left, then one ear, then the other.

Rich: HE STAPLED HIM TO THE BOARD! HE STAPLED HIM TO THE BOARD! THIS IS THE COOLEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN!

Herb: It’s a first

Brandon awakes and starts to try to sit up but finds it really hurts to move- duh- you would too if you were stapled to a board. Gyakusatu just smiles down at Brandon then spits on him. He goes for one last pin attempt.

1

2

3

Brandon has been pinned

Rich: YES!

Gyakusatu pushes the board and Brandon out the ring. On the way down, Brandon rips away from the board, blood is everywhere. Gyakusatu patiently awaits for his next opponent

HolyJose

HolyJose makes his way down the ramp with two kendo sticks in hand. The EWA crowd is booing the hell out of him- HolyJose just ignores them

Rich: Finally some competition for Gyakusatu. Least he had a nice little warm up

HolyJose slides in the ring, tosses his kendo sticks to the side and spears Gyakusatu sending him crashing out the arena floor. HolyJose follows him out, pulls Gyakusatu up and whips him hard into the ringpost. Gyakusatu is down. HolyJose walks over to where a ring attendant is shitting and shoves him out of his seat. HolyJose then picks up the chair, walks over to Gyakusatu and nails him with it twice. HolyJose then re enters the ring and grans one of the kendo sticks. The ref has started to count Gyakusatu out by now

1

2

Rich: Gyakusatu looks to be in danger of losing his title

Herb: At least he may fall to one of the best wrestlers in this sport

Blaze Xedir

Blaze comes out through the crowd, jumps over the guard rails onto Brandon barely moving body in the process. He then rushes into the ring tackling HolyJose to the mat where they are both trading punches

Rich: Wait, its supposed to be one on one- why the hell is he out here?

Herb: They have been feuding over on PAIN!. Blaze was not scheduled to be in the match but I thing he doesn’t want HolyJose to win

The ref is still counting out Gyakusatu

3

4

5

Gyakusatu slowly gets to his feet then slides into the ring where he sees HolyJose and Blaze still fighting it out on the mat. Gyakusatu pulls himself up by the ropes and just sits back in one of the corners watching HolyJose and Blaze still going at it. Both HolyJose and Blaze finally roll out the ring onto the arena floor where they continue fighting it out. The ref starts counting HolyJose out by now

1

2

3

4

HolyJose finally gets the upperhand and pulls Blaze up and whips him into the guarlrails

5

6

HolyJose grabs a camera from a fan and repeatingly smashes it into Blaze’s face- busting him wide open

7

8

9

HolyJose pulls Blaze up one more time then suplexes him back onto the guardrail looking like he has broken Blaze into two

10

HolyJose has been counted out

Rich: Well it looks like Blaze got what he wanted- too bad it probably is the end of Blaze’s wrestling career

HolyJose looks towards the ring pissed- with good reason- he had Gyakusatu’s number. HolyJose finally walks up the ramp towards the back to a standing ovation. Even Gyakusatu applauds him. HolyJose, now standing on the stage, takes a bow, then flips off the crowd before finally going backstage

Rich: Now that man has class and the fans gave him the respect he deserves.

Herb: And then he flips them off.

Rich: Its probably just his way of saying goodbye

The EMT crew rush out with a board and check on Blaze. Needing a place to set the board down, they push Brandon out the way and put the board on the floor. They then load Blaze on the board and rush him backstage for some medical attention. Brandon is now screaming out for some help but nobody is coming

KiLLA

KiLLA and his crew come out once more- and again, one of his guys is carrying a body bag

Herb: Wait, he is not in this match.

Rich: Nope, I think they are just out here to take out the garbage again

And that’s just what they do. The place Brandon in the bodybag, zip it up and carry him out the arena yet again to throw him in the dumpster

Gyakusatu is still resting in the ring, awaiting his next opponent

Taco Torres

Taco rushes down the ramp, then jumps onto the ring apron. Gyakusatu picks up one of the kendo sticks and starts tapping the mat with it. Taco decides he wants no part of this and tells the ref he forfeits

Rich: What a pussy

Dingo Mac

Dingo Mac makes his way down the ramp then all of a sudden

POOF!

Dingo Mac disappears and in his place

Ali Kazam

Ali Kazam, wearing a cape, appears from a cloud of smoke to a hug pop from the crowd

Rich: Wait? Um, how did he do that?

Herb: Magic

Ali Kazam rushes to the ring and slides in but Gyakusatu is waiting for him with kendo stick in hand. Gyakusatu swings it at him but as soon as it hits Ali Kazam it turns into flower- which surprises Gyakusatu. Ali Kazam then throws a fireball into Gyakusatu face blinding him temporarily. Ali Kazam then removes his cape and wraps it around Gyakusatu neck- choking him. The ref gets down to check to see if Gyakusatu wants to give up but Gyakusatu refuses to. Instead Gyakusatu somehow reaches up and rakes Ali Kazam in the eye causing Ali to let go of the cape. Still somewhat blinded, Gyakusatu manages to grab another kendo stick and wacks Ali in the head- knocking him out. Gyakusatu goes for the pin

1

2

3

Ali Kazam has been pinned

Rich: Gyakusatu is a motherfucking machine. I think he’s going to win this

Ali Kazam gets to his feet, bows to Gyakusatu, then disappears in a clowd of smoke

Herb: So did Dingo forfeit? I mean he was supposed to be in the match but never made it to the ring.

Rich: I don’t know. I know EHC is trying to get pretty much everybody else in this match

Gyakusatu ask for a bottle of water and uses it to wash out his eyes. The ref checks on him again to see if he wants to continue and Gyakusatu just waves him off


Johnny Hot

Johnny Hot comes out on the stage to the loudest boos of the night. He has a trashcan full of weapons with him. Before he can make his way down the ramp, he is jumped by both Paco and Taco Torres. The brothers grab bats from out the trash can and start wailing away on Hot- after about a minute, Hot has been beaten to a bloody pulp. Paco and Taco celebrate on the stage for a good minute while EMT members come out and load Hot on a board and take him to the back

Herb: Wow, and this was one of the few men I thought would finally pin Gyakusatu.

Rich: Me too, he didn’t even get a chance

Paco and Taco finally go backstage but not before the shout out ‘EWNCW! Her we come!’

Amadeus Frewin

The Satanic one makes his way down the ring without his wife- one his way down, he grabs a bat and a steel stop sigh from out the garbage can that Johnny Hot brought out

Rich: Haven’t seen a lot from this guy but what I have seen I am impressed. . This is the first time his wife hasn’t come out with him though

Herb: He probably doesn’t want her to get hurt

Frewin tosses the stop sign into the ring, hitting Gyakusatu in the head with it, dazing him a bit. Frewin then slides into the ring and rams the bat into Gyakusatu, gut causing him to double over in pain. Frewin then hits him on the back a few times with the bat causing Gyakusatu to finally fall to the mat. Frewin drops the bat, then picks up the stop sigh and bashes Gyakusatu with it a few times. He then drops the sign, pulls up Gyakusatu and quickly DDTs him into the sign. Frewin goes for the pin

1

2

2.8888899999- Gyakusatu barely kicks out

Rich: Wow, how did he do that?

Frewin pulls Gyakusatu up once more and again DDTs him into the sign, then covers him for the pin

1

2

3

Gyakusatu has been pinned

Herb: And we have a new Hardcore Champion
Rich: Yeah, but for how long? Still a few more guys in the match

Gyakusatu slides out the ring and starts his way up the ramp- as with HolyJose, Gyakusatu also receives a standing ovation and the crowd his chanting his name at deafening volumes

Kid Wonder

TOAK’s Kid Wonder rushes down the ramp and into the ring to massive boos. He gets right in Frewin’s face, spitting in it

Rich: What is this tool doing out here?

Herb: I don’t know and I don’t care

Frewin shoves Kid Wonder down to the mat and starts kicking Kid Wonder in his groin. Frewin then reaches down and picks up the stapler and gets on top of Wonder, beating him with it. Wonder is screaming out at the top of his lungs so Frewin decides to take the stapler and staple Wonder’s mouth shut. Frewin then hits Wonder in the face with the stapler, knocking him out cold. Frewin goes for the pin

1

2

3

Kid Wonder has been pinned

Rich: Gotta love that stapler

Frewin shoves Kid Wonder out the ring and awaits his next opponent

Tobias Alexander

Tobias comes down the ramp to mostly boos. He is in street clothes, but is ready for action. He slides into the ring and is met with a spear from Frewin- which actually does nothing to Tobias, but knocks Frewin out cold.

Rich: What the hell?

Tobias pulls up his shirt, revealing a cast iron skillet ties around the front of his chest. Tobias undoes it, dropping the skillet to the mat, then covering Frewin for the pin

1
2

3

Frewin has been pinned

Herb: Great idea

Rich: AWESOME IDEA! And with that, Tobias is the new Hardcore Champion

E.T.

E.T. comes out the crowd and slides into the ring where Tobias meets him with a stiff kick to the head taking the big man down. Tobias then grabs the iron skillet and starts bashing E.T. in the face with it, opening him up., then covering him for the pin

1

2

2.88655555- E.T. kicks out

Herb: A lesser man couldn't have kicked out of that

E.T. blood flowing freely from his nose, grabs Tobias by the balls, squeezing them as hard as he can- Tobias is screaming at the top of his lungs, but somehow manages to grab the stapler and punches E.T. in the face with it, finally knocking him out- then covering him for another pin attempt

1

2

3

E.T. has been pinned

Shaz

Shaz waste no time rushing down the ramp, climbing up on the turnbuckle and flies off hitting an unaware Tobais with a flying dropkick to the back of the head. Tobias is down, Shaz quickly covers him for the pin

1

2

3

Tobias has been pinned

Rich: Shaz took advantage of a hurting Tobias. Very smart move.

Herb: And we have yet another new Hardcore Champion

Shaz is celebrating in the ring waiting for Tobias and E.T. to be get out the ring when...

Devon Jones

Devon Jones, who had been sitting in the front row, climbs over the guardrail, then slides into the ring right behind Shaz, picks up a bat and wacks Shaz in the back of the head with it- knocking Shaz out cold. Devon then covers him for the pin

1

2

3

Shaz has been pinned

Rich: I love it. Devon has been sitting out here the whole time- the element of surprise

Herb: And we have yet another new Hardcore Champion and 3 bodies still laying around in the ring

EMT members come out to check on E.T., Shaz and Tobias. E.T. and Tobias are helped to the back, but Shaz refuses help. He slides out the ring and walks backstage by himself

Marc Medeiros

Marc Medeiros, Brandon's brother who wrestled for HWA, rushes down to the ring, slides in and is met by a spear from Devon.

Rich: Brandon's loser brother- why is he here?

Devon then picks up the stapler and starts hitting Marc with it in the chest, then the face. Devon then starts stapling Marc all over his face, then all the way down his chest all the way down to his groin. Marc is screaming like a little girl by now. Devon then pulls Marc up and goes to whip him into the ropes, but Marc somehow finds it in him to hit a quick, stiff clothesline bring Devon down to the mat. Marc reaches down into his own trunks and pulls out a dildo and is about to hit Devon with it. Devon, quickly thinking, kicks Marc in the nuts, hops up, grabs a kendo stick and starts wailing away at Marc. Devon then picks up the dildo, shoves it in Marc's mouth, then rolls him up for the pin

1

2

3

Marc is pinned

A fan throws some duct tape into the ring, Devon picks it up and tapes Marc's mouth shut with the dildo still stuck in it.

Rich: HAAA HAAAA

Herb: Devon is the man

Marc, embarrassed, rolls out the ring, and walks up the ramp and backstage- the crowd is booing the hell out of him and throwing stuff at him- the fans are chanting Devon's name

Darius

Darius also comes out through the crowd. He has a baseball bat covered with brabwire in his hand. He slides into the ring and Devon backs away and grabs a kendo stick. They both shout back and forth at each other, daring each other to make the first move. Finally they both decided to just rush at each other. They both start swinging their weapons at each other- drawing blood with each blow

Darius

Devon

Darius

Devon

Darius

Devon

Darius

Devon

By now, both men are spent, Devon is covered in blood from head to toes and just finally collapses. Darius does too, falling right on top of Devon. The ref jumps down and counts for the pin

1

2

3

Devon has been pinned

EMT members come out yet one more time and check on both men. They carry Devon to the back, but Darius says he will continue

Rich: Not sure how he can go on, but he is the newest champ

Destruction

Destruction rushes down the ramp and rushes at Darius knocking him into the ropes. Destruction picks Darius up, bodyslams him to the mat and covers him for the pin

1

2

3

Darius is pinned

Herb: And yet another new champ

Rich: An a great one at that. I believe we have one more wrestler left in this match

Herb: Correct you are. No idea who it is though. Can Destruction win this and be the final EWA Hardcore Champion? We will find out as soon as this last guy comes out

Van Hooligan X

Van comes out to a pretty big pop from the crowd despite him being a heel. Van has his cricket bat in his hand. He rushes down to the ring and slides right in. He gets right in Destructions face- shoving him down to the mat.

Rich: Yes! Van is in the mother fucking house

Destruction quickly gets back up, shoving Van right back. Van responds in kind with a cricket bat to the side of Destrution's head. All that does is makes Destruction madder. Destruction head buts Van on the nose, busting it. In pain, Van drops to his knees. While Van is down there, he eyes the iron skillet. He picks it up and rams it into Destructions groin. Destruction goes down. Van, still kneeled down reaches over, picks up his cricket bat, climbs on Destructions chest and shoves the bat into Destructions throat. Van yells at the ref to start counting the pin. After the ref sees that both Destructions shoulders are indeed on the mat, he starts to count

1

2

3

Destruction has been pinned

Final winner and Hardcore Champion- Van Hooligan X

The ref raise Vans arm in victory and Van demands the ref get his damn belt now. And thats just what the ref does

Rich: Van deserved this. He has been here from the begining

Herb: I agree

Van grabs the belt from the ref and yells at him to do something for him. No one can really hear what he said- but a ring attendant is sent backstage

Herb: Now what?

Faith LeFlur

Faith walks down the ramp with a mic in hand- she looks pretty nervous. She gets down to right outside the ring and walks up the ring steps and into the ring

Rich: And what is this fine piece of ass doing out here?

Faith: And your Hardcore Champion- Van Hooligan X

Faith then leaves the ring and heads back up the ramp to whistles and cheers

Van holds his title up and the crowd cheers. Van finally climbs out the ring and heads back stage

Rich: I have to say, that was a great match- everybody in it deserves a lot of respect- well except for Kid Wonder, Brandon and Marc Medeiros.

Herb: Agreed

Ring Announcer: The following contest is set for one fall, where the winner, will be crowned EWA's last ever, WORLD CHAMPION!



*Alex Kidd hops off the turnbuckle and begins to look down the ramp, waiting for the entrance of Rob Rage. The fans are still letting Kidd have it though, as they're booing their brains out. That changes in a matter of seconds though, as out comes Rob Rage.



*Rob Rage steps down from the top rope and these fans are still screaming as hard as they can for Rage, as this will be the final match in EWA history! Emotions are high, and the competition is higher. Rob Rage and Alex Kidd look at each other face to face, and it doesn't even look like it's out of hate for each other, but out of nervousness. Think of the thoughts that must have been running through these guy's heads all day, knowing that they will be involved in the last ever match of this company's history. Nerves are high right now, and this packed crowd is going to be getting their money's worth tonight, with the last ever match in this company's great history. Alex Kidd, who normally is so cocky, and arrogant, but that is not showing tonight. Normally, he would have a look of confidence. Tonight, it looks like his face is full of worries. He's the only champion in EWA history, and he could make that permanent with a win here tonight. You look over to Rob Rage, normally with a smile on his face, just enjoying being able to compete tonight, but now, he has just as much worries in his eyes as Kidd does. These two are worried, they're nervous, and emotions are running high, which should be the making of one great match. The two stare each other down from opposite corners, until we finally get the ring announcer speaking*

Ring Announcer: In this corner, he comes to us from Sonora, Mexico, he weighed in tonight at 232 pounds, he is the current EWA World Heavyweight Champion, ALEX KIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDD!!!!

*The crowd once again erupts in boos as Alex Kidd holds the world title high above his head*

Ring Announcer: And now introducing the challenger, he comes to us from Buckingham, England, he weighed in tonight at 224 pounds, ROB RAAAAAAAGGEEEEEE!!!

*The referee stands next to Alex Kidd, requesting he hand him the title. Kidd looks at the ref, and kisses the title for what could be the last time before slowly handing it to the referee. The referee shows the title to Rob Rage before walking to the centre of the ring and holding the title above his head with both hands. The ref hands the title to the time keeper, and goes back to the centre of the ring. He point at Kidd, as Kidd nods, then does the same to Rage before the bell is finally rung.

Rage and Kidd both stare into each others eyes blankly, as if they can't even notice how loud this crowd is right now. After blankly staring at each other for a few seconds, they start to get closer. Kidd tries to start off with a quick kick to the side of Rage, but Rage is able to avoid it. The two then back away again and we get another stare off. The emotion that is in this arena tonight, the fans are going insane, who is going to walk out of here tonight as EWA's last ever World Champion.

Back to the action, Kidd attempts another quick kick, but Rage is still evasive, and keeping an eye on Kidd as his kicks can be deadly. The two quickly go into the clinch, and just as quickly, Kidd gets the better of it locking Rage in with a side headlock. Kidd lets go of the headlock though, and goes in behind Rage and ties his left hand behind his back. Rage counters out of it, pushing Kidd of the ropes and hitting a hip toss to Kidd, and then goes to a headlock on Rage. Kidd pushes his way to his feet, and pushes Rage to the ropes, forcing a break. Just as the ref is trying to break the hold though, Kidd tries to take advantage with a roundhouse to the head of Rage, but Rage quickly ducks out of the way.

Rage reestablishes himself, and then attempts a quick jab to Kidd, but Kidd moves out of the way before he can get any contact. Kidd may have escaped for a minute, but just after that, Rage nails Kidd with a double leg take down. Kidd tries to lock in a scissor hold on the way down, but Rage rolls into an arm bar. Kidd quickly pushed himself to his feet to alleviate some of the pressure, but Rage pushes him right back to the ground, keeping the arm bar locked in.

Kidd once again pushes himself to his feet, and pushes Rage to the ropes, and throws him off the ropes. Bouncing off the ropes though, Rage hits a shoulder block knocking Kidd to the ground. Kidd goes up to his knees, and begins to clap at Rage, before making it to his feet. The two go back into a clinch, which Rage gets the better of, locking in a headlock, and turning that into an over the shoulder take down, keeping the head lock in. Kidd once again pushes himself to his feet. It seems like Kidd knows exactly what to do in these types of situations. He gets back to his feet, alleviates the pressure, and tries to get out from there. You can call him whatever you want, but there's no doubt Kidd deserves his spot right now.

Kidd once again backs Rage to the ropes, and sends him off them, but Rage knows his way around the ring, doing the same thing he did last time, and knocking Kidd to the ground with a shoulder block. Rage goes off the ropes, as Kidd turns over to his back, and Rage jumps over. Rage goes off the ropes as Kidd makes it back to his feet, and does the leap frog over Rage, who continues off the ropes. When he gets back to Kidd, Kidd hits a picture perfect hip toss bringing Rage down. Rage quickly gets up, only to be knocked down again by a quick drop kick by Alex Kidd. Rage tries to go over to the ropes for a break, but Kidd stays on the attack, and hits Rage with an over the shoulder take down landing in a head lock.

Kidd keeps the head lock in for a good 10 seconds, until Rage finally gets to a verticle base to rid some of the pressure on the head lock. Rage pushes Kidd off the ropes now, and this time it's Kidd getting the better of Rage with a shoulder block, knocking Rage to the ground. Rage gets up, and avoids a quick roundhouse kick by Kidd, and attempts to go for a Rage bomb early! Kidd wants nothing to do with it though, and quickly fights out of it. Now Kidd though tries get a fisherman's suplex to Rage, but Rage fights out of that quickly as well. After two failed finishing attempts, the two once again have a stare down. Emotions are high now, and we are in the midst of what will be the defining moment in EWA history, right here, and right now!

Both men still staring each other down, and this crowd has not been quiet since this match started, as they're currently starting a “Rob Rage!” chant. Now Kidd and Rage look to go into a clinch, but Kidd decides to go a different route by hitting a quick kick to the side of the leg of Rage, and he follows up with a seconds, and then finished it with a side kick to the upper thigh, knocking Rage to his hands and knees. Kidd follows up by stomping on the back of Rage, and now he looks to be in control.

Kidd lifts Rage to his feet, and hits a blow to face of Rage, knocking him into a sitting position in the corner. Kidd then takes a few stomps to the chest of Rage, before the ref is able to back him out. Kidd lifts Rage to his feet, and then whips him into the opposite corner of the ring, but Rage counters by sending Kidd himself stomach first into the turnbuckle, followed up by a running bulldog to Kidd. Rage then quickly goes into our first pin of the match up.

1 2 kick out by Kidd at an early 2. Rage doesn't want to let this moment go to waste though, and gets on the attack on Kidd by locking in a front head lock on him. Kidd, as always, knows what to do, and gets to a vertical base. With the head lock still locked in, Kidd takes a few shots to the mid section of Rage, forcing him to break the hold. After it's broken up, Kidd hits a quick punch to the head of Rage, and bounces himself off the ropes, only to be met by a huge running clothesline by Rage! Kidd notably holds his mouth, before Rage quickly goes into the cover.

1 but Kidd quickly kicks out before even getting to 2. Rage will stay on the attack, and go into a side head lock on Kidd. Kidd tries to get to a vertical base, but Rage pulls him down, and then locks Kidd's arm between his legs. Kidd is able to pull out of it though, and then makes it back up to his feet. Rather than sending Rage off the ropes, Kidd takes a different approach and hits a back suplex on Rage! Kidd quickly goes into the cover.

1 2 but Rage kicks out at an early 2. Kidd pulls Rage up to his feet, and then irish whips him into the corner. Rage goes chest first into the turnbuckle and falls to the ground. Kidd once again goes into a quick cover.

1 2 early 2 again, as Rage kicks out. Kidd pulls Rage to his feet, only for Rage to push Rage into the opposite turnbuckle. Rage now has Kidd in the corner, and takes a shot at Kidd's mid section, followed by an elbow to the mid section. Rage then whips Kidd into the opposite turnbuckle. Kidd comes walking forward, and Rage hits a kick to the abdomen, followed by a snap suples knocking Kidd right out. Rage now quickly goes into a cover

1 2 and Kidd kicks out just before 3 to keep this match alive. Rage then stalks and waits for Kidd to get up, and when he does, he's going to attempt another Rage Bomb. He gets locked in, but Kidd fights out, and then hits a kick to the mid section of Rage, then he plants Rage with a big DDT. Kidd rolls Rage over, and attempts another pin.

1 2 but Rage kicks out at the last second possible, keeping this match alive. Before Rage can make it anywhere, Kidd locks in the head scissors to Rage. Rage tries to separate Kidd's legs to escape the hold, but Kidd continues putting more and more pressure on it. Rage is able to roll over though, and then has the strength to lift himself up, with Kidd on top of him. It looked like Rage was going to go for an electric chair, but Kidd nailed an elbow to the forehead of Rage, and hops off of his shoulder. He then grabs Rage, and proceeds to throw him to the outside of the ring. Kidd smirks, and waits a few seconds, before exiting to the outside of the ring.

He goes over to Rage, picks him up, and drags him towards the ring, before he slams Rage's head right into the ring canvas. And then throwing back into the ring, with Rage's head still hanging on the outside. Kidd hits a couple forearms to the back of Rage, and then climbs to the ring apron, still outside the ring, then hopping onto the second rope on the turnbuckle. Kidd takes a moment to pander to the fans, before jumping off the turnbuckle and nailing Rage in the back of the head with a diving knee drop. Kidd once again picks up Rage, and throws him into the ring, before entering under the bottom rope himself. Before pushing Rage farther away from the ropes, Kidd attempts a pin on Rage.

1 2 But Rage rolls the shoulder up, to the disbelief of Alex Kidd. Kidd gets up, as Rage tries to pull himself up with the ropes, until Kidd decides to help him up, puling Rage to his feet. Kidd has Rage by the head, and does a knee to the abdomen of Rage, followed by a second one, pushing Rage to the corner. Kidd then whips Rage into the opposite corner, and goes running attempting to spear him into the turnbuckle, but Rage dives out of the way, forcing Kidd to go shoulder first into the turnbuckle. Both men are down for a few seconds, until they both make it to their feet at around the same time. Kidd takes the first strike though, and hits a running clothesline to Rage. Kidd then goes into the cover.

1 2 but Rage kicks out at 2, keeping this one alive. As Rage gets up, Kidd will not rest, as he hits Rage with an over head take down, followed by a head lock. Kidd keeps this hold locked in tight, but Rage is able to push his way up to his feet. Rage pushes the arms of Kidd, and then hits a kick to the mid section of Rage, followed by a quick shot to the head of Kidd. Rage then whips Kidd into the corner and goes running, only to be met by the boot of Alex Kidd. Kidd then jumps up on the turnbuckle and hits a turning cross body landing in a pin.

1 2 Rage kicks out, and he looks to be a bit shaken up, and rolls to the outside apron. As Rage starts to climb back up, Kidd meets him, and will attempt to suplex him back into the ring. He tries once, but Rage stays put. He tries again, but again, Rage will stay on the apron. Kidd looks to try again, but Rage counters it into a suplex of his own, sending Kidd over the top rope, and both men landing back first right to the ground on the outside. This really took an affect on both guys though, as they're both out. Rage slowly crawls over to Kidd, and picks him up, and rolls him back in the ring. Pushing him away from the ropes, Rage crawls into a cover.

1 2 but Kidd kicks out just in time to keep this one going. Rage pulls Kidd to his feet, and then nails him with a quick snap suplex. Rage then runs off the ropes, falls into Kidd with an elbow to the stomach, landing in another pin.

1 2 But Kidd stays alive again, as it seems neither of these men want to quit. Rage pulls Kidd up to his feet and attempts putting him up on his shoulders for a power slam, but Kidd hits an elbow to fight out of it. Kidd runs at Rage, only for him to counter and hit the same power slam he was just looking for a moment ago! He lands in a cover!

1 2 but Kidd refuses to be put away. Rage goes to his feet quickly, and is stalking for Kidd to make it up to his feet. When Kidd makes it up to his feet, Rage hits him with a quick jab to the face, followed by another to the mid section. Kidd replies to this though with a big punch to the head. Rage replies with a kick to the mid section. Kidd replies with roundhouse kick to the back of the leg, as the crowd is in this one, chanting “Yay!” to every Rage shot, followed by a “Boo!” for every Kidd shot. Kidd starts to get the better of it though, hitting three punches to the head right in a row. He then attempts to whip Rage off the ropes, but ends up going off the ropes himself. When he meets Rage off the ropes, Rage locks in an abdominal stretch! Rage has it locked in tight! Rage is putting as much pressure on this submission as he possibly can, all just trying to somehow pull out this win by making Kidd tap.

Rage continues to apply pressure, but Alex Kidd takes the low road, and claws Rage in the eyes forcing him to break up the hold, and follows it by knocking Rage down with a hip toss. Rage gets up, and Kidd goes running. It looked like they both had the same idea in mind though, as they both try for a clothesline, knocking both men down. With both men down, the ref begins a count.

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3

4

5

6

Both men are able to make it to their feet at the same time now. Kidd goes for a clothesline but Rage ducks under and runs off the ropes and hits a running shoulder block on Kidd. He waits for Kidd to get up, and then hits him from behind and attempts a back suplex on Kidd, but Kidd flips over Rage and lands on his feet behind Rage, and then stacks Rage up with a school boy roll up!

1 2 but Rage is able to power out at the last second. Rage quickly gets up and hits a kick to the gut of Kidd, before attempting to send him into the turnbuckle. Kidd counters by sending Rage himself into the turnbuckle. Kidd attempts a running clothesline into the turnbuckle, but Rage moves out of the way, and Kidd goes chest first into the turnbuckle. Now Rage waits behind Kidd and attempts another back suplex, and is actually able to hit this one!

Both men are down, and both slowly make their way to their feet. Right when they do, Alex Kidd somehow gets a burst of energy and nails Rage with a running drop kick. He follows up by hitting Rage with a standing neck breaker! Now Kidd slowly waits for Rage to get up, stalking him. As soon as Rage makes it to his feet, Kidd nails Rage with a roundhouse kick to the back of the head of Rob Rage! Into the cover goes Kidd!

1 2 But Rage rolls a shoulder up at the last minute, and now both men are out in pure exhaustion. The referee begins to count as both men look to be out right now. The count Is stopped short at 6 when both men make it up. Both being very tired, and trying to just find some way to finish this match to pick up a win. Rage strikes Kidd with a blow to the head, backing him up to the turnbuckle. Rage then climbs on the ropes on top of Kidd, and starts throwing down punches. He nails at least 5 in a row, and right when he goes for number 6, Alex Kidd grabs him from underneath in a power bomb position, and slams Rage into the ground neck first on the standing power bomb! Into the cover goes Kidd!

1 2 But Rage somehow gets his shoulder off the mat! Kidd can't believe, these fans can't believe, I doubt even Rage can believe it! Kidd complains to the ref, as the ref stands by his decision, the thoughts start to wonder through Kidd's head “What do I have to do to win this match?” Well, he's going to need what he has and more for sure. Kidd slowly lifts Rage up to his feet and then hits a kick to the lower knee of Rob Rage, following up with an enzinguri to the back of the head of Rage. Now Rage is down and out next to the turnbuckle, and Alex Kidd is climbing the top turnbuckle. Kidd stands at the top, and points to the sky, before nailing a 630 splash! What impact by Kidd, as he crawls into the cover!

1 2 3- NO! Rage kicked out! Rage kicked out! Kidd can't believe it! What a match! Neither man giving an inch, they both want this more than anything, and it showed there. Rage appeared to be completely drained, but he somehow was able to roll the shoulder up. This is now simply a match of who wants it more, and it's pretty hard to tell who wants it more between these two with how much effort both of these men have put into this match.

Back to the action now, as both men are slowly working their way to their feet. Kidd pulls himself up using the ropes, as Rob Rage makes up to his feet. Rage walks towards Kidd and then nails him with punch to the head, followed by a knee to the stomach. After the knee to the stomach, Rage puts Kidd in the suplex position, and he's looking for a Rage Bomb! He lifts Kidd up, and nails him right down to the ground with a huge Rage Bomb! Into the pin!

1 2 3! NO! Kidd kicked out. It looked like the refs hand had hit the mat, but Kidd somehow rolled the shoulder up at the very last possible moment! A completely insane match going on right now, and I don't think anyone could think of a better last EWA match than this right here! Rage now is looking to go back to work though, as he slowly pulls Kidd to his feet, and he's going to attempt a second Rage Bomb. He lifts Kidd up, but Kidd hops over behind Rage, and then pushes him from behind, but Rage lands going in a head to head collision with the referee knocking both men to the ground hard.

Kidd gets up and realizes what has just happened. He gets a huge grin on his face, as he goes the outside. He goes towards the time keeper, and demands him to give him the EWA World Title. The time keeper refuses, but Kidd just snatches it off of him. Kidd rolls the EWA Title into the ring, then follows into the ring as well, as it looks like Rob Rage, and the ref are both stirring. Rage has just gotten to his feet, and Kidd goes running at him with the title, but Rage ducks under, and Kidd nails the referee with the title! The ref is once again out cold! Kidd can't believe it, and looks down with disbelief. He turns around, and Rob Rage hits a kick to the stomach, hooks the leg, and lifts up Kidd and nails a Rage Bomb!

Everybody is down now. The ref is knocked out by the title, Kidd is knocked out because of the Rage bomb, and Rage is knocked out due to pure exhaustion. There's no movement for about a minute, until Rage starts to pull himself up with the ring ropes. He makes it to his feet, but neither the ref or Alex Kidd have moved since. Rage walks towards Alex Kidd, and begins to lift him to his feet, but Kidd was playing possum, and takes a cheap shot by hitting Rage with a low blow!

It looks like the ref is finally starting to get up, as Kidd walks over and picks up his EWA Championship, and begins stalking for Rage to get up. Rage slowly makes it to his feet, and is right on time as Kidd goes running and nails Rage in the face with the EWA Title, as the ref is just getting up, Kidd slides the title to the outside of the ring before going for a pin! The ref is up and counts!

1 2 NO! RAGE KICKED OUT! He somehow got the shoulder up! Kidd gets up and immediately starts screaming at the ref saying it was three, but the ref is standing by his call! Alec Kidd decides to move on to trying to win this match. He drags Rage over towards the corner, and then begins stomping on the stomach of Rage a few times, before he climbs the turnbuckle. Kidd gets to the top and points to the sky one more time before taking the leap for the 630 splash, but Rage moved out of the way! Kidd's stomach is in serious pain, as he landed right on his stomach on the way down. Rage gets back up, and waits for Kidd. Kidd slowly gets up, and turns around to a kick to the stomach, which looked like it almost caused him to puke. After the kick, Rage pulls Kidd in, suplex position, hooks the leg, lifts Kidd up, and slams him right down for the Rage Bomb! Rage crawls into the cover! The count!

1 2 3! HE DID IT! RAGE WON THE BIG ONE! ROB RAGE HAS DONE IT! Rob Rage is the final EWA World Heavyweight Champion! And what a way for EWA to go out, in the grandest of fashion, with Rob Rage and Alex Kidd, both leaving it all in the ring, and really representing what EWA has been about since day 1. Kidd, the cocky champion who has held the title since the beginning, and Rage, the guy who has given everything he has and more to try to get there, ending with Rage standing tall on EWA's Final Frontier. You can say what you want about either of these men, but they both put it all on the line tonight, and they both earned everything they got, and there definitely is no dispute in who the best man in the arena is tonight, and that is Rob Rage. He has earned this moment!

The referee grabs the EWA Championship, and hands it to Rob Rage, who is still just getting up, currently on his knees. You can clearly see the tears in the eyes of Rob Rage, as he looks at the EWA championship the ref is holding out, and takes it from him, and hugs it tight, tearing up more and more with each second. Rage stands up, and the ref raises his hand. Rage goes on the top turnbuckle and holds up the gold, as Alex Kidd silently exits the ring and goes to the back.

Rage hops down from the turnbuckle, and stands in the centre of the ring. It's just now hitting him, this is the last match he will ever wrestle in EWA. This is the last match that will be wrestled in EWA. The crowd is silent as Rage stands in the centre of the ring, in clear tears, before the fans finally start chanting. “Thank you Rage! Thank you Rage! Thank you Rage!” Rage can't take any of this in without any tears in his eyes, as the crowd continues to not even cheer, but scream “Thank you Rage!”

Herb: And now for the PAIN! World Heavyweight Championsip- Mike Muir is taking on the Champion Thantos

Rich: I guess Muir gets yet another title shot because EWA felt bad for his sorry ass for Barbie Panzer dumping him

Mike Muir

Mike Muir walks out and down the ramp to massive cheers. On the way down to the ring he stops to chat with some of the fans and sign autographs

Rich: I don’t know what the fans see in this loser. I do look up to him for banging Barbie Panzer though

Herb: Me too, me too

Thantos

PAIN! World Champ Thantos walks out on stage to massive boos. He raises his arms up in the air and lets out a loud roar. He then slowly makes his way down to the ring- he is so tall he enters the ring by stepping over the top rope. He hands his belt to the ref who holds it over his head. Thantos gets in Muir’s face- towering over him by a good foot

Rich: And this is the night Mike Muir’s career ends.

Herb: He stood up to Raden Blain time after time and lived to tell. I am sure Muir can handle Thantos

Rich: Raden Blain is a monster- Muir just kept getting lucky every time with him. And as much as I like this Thantos, the reason he beat Raden so easily is Raden had just wrestled three other men- coming out the victor, PAIN! GM Horus Black just decided to screw Raden over making him wrestle again

Pain! Title – Mike Muir vs Thantos- No DQ

Thantos challenges Muir to a test of strength in the middle of the ring, Muir reluctantly accepts knowing Thantos will easily overpower him. And that’s just what Thantos does, he pushes Muir down to his knees, but Muir quickly drives his head into Thantos’ gut, then tackles him to the mat and starts pounding him with hard lefts and rights to the head. Thantos shoves Muir off of him but Muir is quick to jump back on him and continues to pound away at him. Thantos shoves Muir away once more then kicks him in the leg, bringing Muir to the mat. Thantos gets to his feet, stomps on Muir a bit then finallt picks him up and tosses him into the corner with ease. Muir is barely standing up by now and Thantos rushes and him and hits a big splash(Stinger Splash) on Muir, then grabs him by the neck and bull dogs him into the middle of the ring. Thantos covers Muir for the pin

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2.643456- Muir kicks out

Thantos shoves Muir’s face down and demands the ref count the pin again

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2.9888888- Muir kicks out at the last minute.

Thantos pulls Muir up and throws him over the top rope, Muir crashing to the floor awkwardly

Rich: See, I told you Muir was a loser

Thantos climbs to the second turnbuckle and lets out yet another loud growl and fans start throwing all kinds of stuff at him. Thantos finally gets down after a minute, then exits the ring and walks over to Muir, pulls him up and goes to whip M uir into the ringpost, but Muir reverses it and sends Thantos into the ringpost instead. Muir picks up the ring steps and slams them into Thantos back. Muir then shoves Thantos back into the ring and slides back in himself. He covers Thantos for the pin

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Kickout by Thantos

Herb: So far this hasn’t been much of a technical match. Just a lot of punching and kicking

Rich: And at least Muir used his brain and cheated to weaken Thantos down a bit

Herb: It’s a no DQ match

Muir hits Thantos in the face with a few stiff shots, then gets up and starts stomping away at his chest and head before pushing him over and clamping on the Sharpshooter. Muir leans back putting as much pressure on the hold as he can. Thantos is in obvious pain but isn’t giving up

Horus Black

PAIN! GM Horus Black comes out on stage, walks down the ramp and starts waving someone from the back to come to the ring.

Herb: What the hell is he doing here?

Hanz Gruber

Barbie Panzer

Hanz and Barbie rush down to the ring, Barbie, at ringside now, reaches into her pocket and pulls some kind of powder out and throws it in Muir’s face- it doesn’t cause him to let go of the hold, but he obviously can not see now. Hanz slides in the ring and gets behind Muir, pulls him off of Thantos, then hits a Scorpion Death Drop on Muir- knocking him out. Barbie slides into the ring too and starts kicking away at Muir, Hanz joins in too. Horus Black has made his way down to ringside and seems to actually be enjoying what he is watching

Rich: I love this

Sasha Panzer

April Snow

Sasha Panzer and April Snow run down the ramp, slide into the ring.

Rich: Yes, two more people to join in on the beatdown

Herb: I don’t know- Sasha and Barbie don’t get along

Rich: This is the last EWA show ever- I am sure they kissed and made up

Sasha jumps on Barbie, bringing her down to the mat and starts beating the shit out of her. April attacks Hanz, knees him in the nuts and tries to hit him with a DDT but Hanz blocks it. Hanz knees her in the gut, then picks her up and bodyslams her to the mat. Thantos finally gets to his feet and he and Hanz pull Sasha off of Barbie and toss her out the ring near Horus Black. Sasha quickly gets to her feet, but Horus Black grabs her and holds her back

Rich: Ok, I was wrong

Thantos and Hanz both pick up Muir and double bodyslam him to the mat. Thantos covers him for the pin

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April grabs the refs arm, breaking the count. Hanz pulls April up by her long hair and holds her so Barbie can slap her in the face a few times, then starts kicking her in the chest. Thantos gets to his feet too and instructs Barbie to stop, which she does. Thantos then grabs her by the throat and instructs Hanz to let her go as well. Thantos lifts her up by the throat by a good 3 feet up in the air. Muir, who can see again, gets up behind Thantos and low blows him from behind- causing him to let go of April, and fall to his knees. Hanz quickly hits Muir with a quick clothesline- taking him down. Barbie hits April with a stiff shot to the back of the head taking her down too

Raden Blain

Raden Blain rushes down to the ring and slides in. Barbie and Hanz quickly bail out the ring and stand at ringside

Herb: This doesn’t look like it will end well

Muir quickly gets in front of April but Raden ignores them both and instead hits Thantos with a running kick to the face knocking him on his back on the mat. Raden then points to Muir, then to Thantos then he exits the ring, but stays on the apron looking back into the ring

Rich: Well it looks like a bit of payback from Raden to Thantos.

Herb: You can say that again

Rich: Well it looks like a bit of payback from Raden to Thantos

Herb: I didn’t mean that literally

Muir looks over at Raden, then down at Thantos. He then covers Thantos for the pin

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Winner and new PAIN! World Heavyweight Champion- Mike Muir

Rich: Figures he could only win with others helping him

Herb: They were just evening up the odds

Raden Blain then jumps down off the ring apron and says something to Horus Black. Horus shoves Sasha into Raden and starts to run back up the ramp

Ryku O’Ryan

Gaileo

Faith LeFlur

Ryku, Gaileo and Faith come out on stage, then start heading down the ramp so Horus turns around- right into Raden Blain’s waiting grasp. Raden picks him up and chokeslams him hard down on the ramp and just looks down at his broken body. Ryku, Gaileo and Faith join him in staring at him. The then exchange words with Raden who then finally walks to the back with a pretty nice pop from the crowd. Raden, of course, ignores the cheers

Rich: Got some payback to GM Black too

Thantos quietly slides out the ring and heads through the crowd and to the back. Ryku, Gaileo, Faith and Sasha join Muir and April in the ring and celebrate. Barbie and Hanz, unhappy with what they have seen, finally head off backstage to the loudest boos of the night thus far.

Herb: See, I told you earlier today- Muir would win the belt.

After a few minutes of celebrating everybody leaves the ring and heads backstage to a happy crowd

Lillian Garcia walks out on stage with a mic already in hand. The EWA fans cheer wildly for her

Lillian Garcia: Hello EWA! Tonight on the final show of the company we will have a HellCats Battle Royal. The winner of the match will be named the newest and final HellCat’s Champion. That is of course if the current champion doesn’t end up victorious. To be eliniated, you must be thrown ver the top rope and your feet must touch the floorSo without further ado, let me introduce the competitors.

Faith LeFlur.

Iva Hardy

Ette Tour

April Snow

Ashley Ion

Sasha Panzer

Bertha Ray

Ketsueki Karei

And finally Barbie Panzer

All the women have made their way into the ring and most are starting to get in each others faces. Elfrieda Frewin walks out on stage and hands Lillian a note.

Lillian: Excuse me, I have just been informed Mrs Frewin has brought in a few more competitors. And here the are

MsChif

Awesome Kong

Beth Phoenix

Sara Del Rey

Sarita

Cheerleader Mellissa

ODB

Katie Lea

Madison Eagles

Lufisto

Portia Perez

Jennifer Blake

Nicole Matthews

Serena Deeb

Allison Danger

Annie Social

And finally April Hunter

Elfredia leads all these women down to the ring and they all climb onto the ring apron. All the women already in the ring stop in their tracks.

Herb: Holy shit- it’s a who’s who of the indies scene

Rich: And a few from WWE and TNA

Herb: Those lucky to be in those compaies barely have and TV time though

HellCats Battle Royal

All the women that Elfrieda brought down enter the ring and immediately go after everyone but Barbie Panzer, Ette Tour and Bertha Ray. Barbie and Bertha go after Sasha tearing her top off and choking her with it. Annie Social and April Snow are trading left and rights, April finally getting the upper hand- she headbuts Annie and rushes over and pulls Bertha and Barbie off Sasha. ODB takes out her flask and hits April in the back of her head with it, knocking her to the mat. Ketsueki Karei hits ODB with a drop kick that seems to come from nowhere- but it knocks ODB over the ring where she falls to the floor and is eliminated.
Ashley Ion is fighting off both Sarita and Cheerleader Mellissa. Faith LeFlur and Sasha Panzer(now topless) come to Ashley’s rescue, but soon get ganged up on by Katie Lea, Madison Eagles, Lufisto and Portia Perez. Lufisto easily shoves Faith over the top rope and she falls to the floor and is eliminated.

Rich: Boobies!

MsChif, Awesome Kong and Beth Phoenix attack Iva Hardy, breaking her nose in the process, then they toss her over the rope and to the floor- Iva is eliminated. April Snow and Ketsueki Karei attack MsChif, Awesome Kong and Beth Phoenix, but Portia Perez, Jennifer Blake, Nicole Matthews and Serena Deeb attack them. They in turn, are attacked by Sasha Panzer- who somehow manages to push Serena Deeb over the top rope and Debb is eliminated

Herb: Looks like the EWA originals are getting their asses handed to them

Rich: Yeah, their very fine asses.

Awesome Kong and MsChif pull Sasha away from the action and Elfrieda Frewin hands something to April Hunter- a stun gun. April Hunter walks over to where Ashley Ion is being beat down. She zaps Ashley with the gun and is thrown over the top rope by Madison Eagles and Portia Perez. Ashley has been eliminated. April Hunter then tosses the stun gun to Barbie Panzer- who instructs Awesome Kong and MsChif to hold her sister Sasha – which they do. Barbie zaps Sasha in one breast, then the other- Sasha is screaming out in pain while all Barbie, Kong and MsChif can do is laugh.

Rich: I hope her boobs are alright

April Snow and Ketsueki Karei come to Sasha rescue- attacking Kong, Barbie and MsChif. April Snow and Ketsueki Karei manage to push both Kong and MsChif over the top rope and to the floor and now both Kong and MsChif has been eliminated. Barbie goes to attack April Snow but is met with a superkick from Ketsueki Karei instead and the stun gun goes flying out of Barbie’s hand, falling to the mat. April Snow goes to grab it but is punted in the face by Allison Danger. Ketsueki Karei dives for the stun gun but Ette Tour kicks it towards Barbie, then stomps away on Ketsueki Karei’s back. Barbie stuns her with the gun and Ette picks Ketsueki Karei up and easily throws her over the top rope and to the floor- Ketsueki Karei has been eliminated. Ette Tour pulls up April Snow and holds her so Barbie can zap her with the gun- which she does- right in the throat. April screams out in extreme pain. Alison Danger helps Ette pick up April to throw her over the rope but Sasha grabs April’s feet, pulling her back into the ring

Rich: What the hell did she do that for- you want as many people eliminated from the battle royal

Herb: Truth be told, it looks like Sasha only friend in this match is April Snow. In fact, this whole match has been EWA against the Indy, WWE and TNA stars.
April Snow falls back down to the mat but is promptly ganged up on, picked up and thrown over the top rope and is finally eliminated. The rest of the women in the ring circle Sasha Panzer and all start kicking at her. After about 30 seconds- Barbie instructs them to stop and hold Sasha up- Barbie then shocks Sasha in the throat with the stun gun twice. Sasha falls to the mat- she is out cold.

Herb: Holy crap

Katie Lea and Cheerleader Mellissa pick up Sasha motionless body and tosses her over the top rope- Sasha Panzer has been eliminated. April Snow is still on the floor and picks up Sasha and brings her to the back to safety. The rest of the women in the ring stop and turn and look at Barbie. Barbie just smiles at them all. Then instead of attacking her- they all hop over the top rope and jump down to the arena floor- eliminating themselves. Barbie is left alone in the ring

Winner- and still EWA HellCats Champion- Barbie Panzer

Barbie is handed her title and she hoists it high in the air- to massive boos. Barbie finally slides out the ring, walks up to Elfrieda Frewin and gives her a hug. Finally Barbie, Frewin and all the other women that were still at ringside head to the back to booing fans and a shitload of trash being thrown their way

Herb: Well its time for the PAIN TV match. The champ, Harry Richards, will defend his title against Gaileo, Hanz Gruber and wait for it…………………….

Rich: Just say it dammit

Herb: No, I’ll make you wait for it

Rich: Fuck you, I want to know

Herb: You will just have to wait

Rich: Bastard

Harry Richards

Harry Richards comes out and walks down the ramp to a massive pop. He is proudly wearing his TV title around his waist and is all smiles. He hops into the ring and hoist his titke up high for all to see

Herb: What a great kid. Rob Rage should be proud of his pupil

Rich: Yeah, the kid lucked out have someone like Rage as a mentor

Gaileo

Gaileo rushes down the ramp, to some cheers considering what he did earlier, and slides into the ring. He walks up to Harry and offers his hand- Harry shakes it

Herb: I’m really liking Gaileo’s change of heart

Rich: I am sure he is still a bad ass in the ring

Hanz Gruber

Hanz Gruber slowly walks down the ramp to some pretty loud boos. He gets to the ring, climbing onto the ring apron and just stays there

Rich: This man right here will be the new and final PAIN! TV champion- mark my words

Herb: Well we still have one more opponent

Rich: And who the hell is it?

Herb: If you had read the card you would have known

The lights starts flickering, then finally the arena goes to black. After a few seconds past, an explosion goes off at the entrance- and a bright and blinding light comes out of the entrance. A figure walks outl

Shining Light

Rich: Holy Fucking Shit! Shining Light is back!

Herb: And you would have known if you had bothered to look at the card beforehand

Rich: Shut up you dumbass

Shining Light makes his way to the ring and slides right in. Gruber finally enters the ring

Pain! TV Title - Harry Richards(C) vs Gaileo vs Hanz Gruber vs Shining Light

Everybody attacks Hanz Gruber. Gruber fights them off and slides out the ring. Gaileo hits an armdrag on Harry, rolls him up for two count but Harry reverses the roll up for a two count before Shining Light breaks the pin attempt up by kicking Harry in the side, them pulls him up and tosses him over the top rope. Shining lifts Gaileo up and drops him throat first on the top rope. Shining then shoves him down to the mat and goes for a pin attempt

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Gruber grabs Shining by the legs and pulls him off Gaileo breaking the pin. Gruber pulls Shining all the way out the ring and starts beating the hell out of him. Harry, still outside the ring pulls Hanz off of Shining, grabs his arm and whips him into the ringpost- knocking him out

Herb: Doesn’t look like Gruber’s winning this one

Harry pulls Shining up and is about to hit him with forearm to the head but Gaileo, while all this has been going on, has climbed to the top turnbuckle- flies off and takes both Harry and Shining down

Rich: Holy crap- looks like Gaileo will win this one. Gaileo pulls up Shining and shoves him into the ring, Gaileo following close behind. Once in the ring Gaileo goes for the cover

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Herb: And we have a new champ

Shining reverses the pin

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Herb: New Champ!

Gaileo reverses the pin

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Herb: New champ?

Shining reverses the pin

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Herb: Maybe now a new champ?

Gaileo kickout of the pin

Herb: Ok, no new champ

Shining gets to his feet as does Gaileo- they both have a staredown in the middle of the ring until both of them noticing Harry is climbing up to the top turnbuckle. Shing rushes to the corner, also climbing up the same corner. Shining and Harry try to push each other off the turnbuckle but Shining hits Harry in the gut with a few stiff blow, then superplexes him off the corner to the mat. Gaileo quickly goes for the cover

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Shining pulls Gaileo off and now both are trading blows. Hanz Gruber has now slide back into the ring with a chair- he hits Gaileo, then Shining in the back taking them both down to the mat. Harry Richards gets behind Gruber and pulls him down rolling him up for the pin

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Winner- and still EWA PAIN TV Champion- Harry Richards

Harry gets to his feet and the ref raises his arm in victory. Hanz gets to his feet, picks up the chair and nails Harry in the back of the head with it. Hanz walks up to Gaileo next and nails him with the chair. He does the same thing to Shining next, then nails the ref with the chair before finally leaving the ring, walking up the ramp and to the back to trash being thrown at him

Herb: Sore loser

Rich: Nope, just sending a message to all the guys in the back and in other feds

Herb: Yeah, that he is a sore loser